A Boy’s Big Moment

For a Ramsey family’s third son’s bar mitzvah party, it was finally time to go all out.

As her youngest son approached his 13th birthday, you’d think that mom-of-three-boys Rachel Dewan would be an old hand at bar-mitzvah planning. Not so. “My oldest son was never a party kid and didn’t want a big celebration, so we just had a family gathering,” says Dewan, who lives in Ramsey. “And my middle son is a party kid— he actually works as a DJ now—but his bar mitzvah was during COVID. A big party wasn’t going to happen.” Therefore, as the family’s youngest, Rakhi, approached his big day, it was decided: “If we’re ever going to do a big event, now’s the time!”

That event saw 130 people, about 70 of them middle schoolers, gather first at the Barnert Temple in Franklin Lakes and then at Avenue Event Space in South Hackensack on Dec. 6 for a celebration done in shades of blue. That’s Rakhi’s favorite color, and he was very specific about one shade, donning a suit in that hue. It was one of the few things he was insistent about.

“There can be some challenges when you’re planning something for a 13-year-old,” says Dewan, who put the party together, “but he’s just not that kind of kid. He’s so agreeable, and he just wanted everyone to be happy and have a good time. One of the hardest parts was cutting down the guest list: Rakhi has never met a human being he didn’t make friends with. We actually call him ‘the mayor’ because of that.”

Besides that shade of blue, the décor incorporated some of Rakhi’s favorite sports—soccer in particular, but he also loves golf and baseball—as well as plays on his unique first name. “We had a ‘rock candy’ bar, and ‘rock-tails’ instead of cocktails for the adults,” says Dewan. Other highlights included a catering spread by Fair Lawn-based Joe “The Sauce Guy” D’Angelo, who made sure there were lots of gluten-free options that Rahki, who has celiac disease, could enjoy with everyone else; dancing and games run by Avenue Event Space’s DJ that had the kids up, moving and laughing; and a 15-minute DJ set by middle brother Kieren, something Rakhi had his heart set on from day one.

“It was a really joyful day,” says Dewan. “Everyone was smiling. At the end, I asked Rakhi what his favorite part was, and he told me, ‘Mom, literally everything.’ He had the best time, and that’s what really mattered to all of us.”