How a Banker Keeps Her Balance

A chat with Bergen’s only female bank CEO is rich with insights about finance— and fitting in family and career.

Is it still OK to ask high achievers about gender? After all, it’s 2017; women have been everything from admirals to astronauts—and almost a U.S. president. But there’s still only one female bank CEO in Bergen County. She’s Edgewater resident Nancy E. Graves, 64, who last April was named head of the Bank of New Jersey and its holding company, Fort Lee–based Bancorp. In a recent chat, BERGEN Editor in Chief Rita Guarna couldn’t resist posing a question about what it’s like to be a bank boss—and a “she.”

In a study in the Journal of Business Ethics, Finnish researchers found U.S. banks with female CEOs less likely to fail in a financial crisis than banks run by men. Study authors theorized that women leaders may be more conservative. What do you think?

I’m not sure if there’s a gender difference. But I would theorize that with so few female CEOs, the ones there have more experience and heightened leadership abilities partly because for them it’s been a more difficult path to the top. My own strategy is to be inclusive, collaborative and transparent, and to stay in touch with the community.

What’s the biggest mistake people make about money?

Too often they spend their gross income, not their net pay. When you take a new job, think about how the offer is made in gross dollars. Your $60,000 salary is really closer to $42,000; your biweekly pay $1,600, not $2,300. Not realizing this can lead to overspending, which puts even more pressure on family cash flow. Avoid debt, especially credit cards. Invest in your future by contributing to a 401(k) or other retirement account. Become a saver.

But don’t most people know that stuff?

I’m on the board of directors of Junior Achievement, a nonprofit that provides financial literacy education to more than 60,000 young New Jerseyans each year. Often kids say they’re going to tell their parents what they learned in the course. So while Mom and Dad might know about this stuff, there’s a void in imparting information about budgeting, planning, the costs of borrowing and the many benefits of saving. Education is the key to money management, and for most people it’s a lifelong learning process.

What’s the most outlandish thing you’ve seen in banking?

When my company acquired an Illinois bank, we arrived to transfer ownership and count the cash. We found the bank vault filled with shotguns that belonged to local residents. It was general practice for the owners to just stop by and go into the vault to get the guns whenever they needed them.

What made you choose a career in banking?

I started as a commodity trader developing hedge strategies for currencies and agriculture, then was a financial consultant to professional corporations and business owners. I viewed banking as relatively simple compared with financial services and was not convinced that I should make a career move. But I took a leap of faith and joined a bank.

Once there, how did you succeed?

I started with one business line and moved on to manage multiple areas of operations and revenue. That was the foundation for later bank executive positions. I didn’t have a plan, didn’t know how it would all work out. But I grasped every opportunity and worked to differentiate myself.

Why should someone choose a community bank over a “big” bank?

For one thing, community banks generally have lower fees (or no fees) but can offer the same services. Community banks gather deposits and lend locally. This provides capital for businesses in the community, which supports jobs and growth. Ninety percent of banks in the country are community banks. They’re generally more responsive because decision makers are local.

Do you have a favorite source for following economic trends?

Barron’s, American Banker and the Federal Reserve Bank and Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation publications.

What can’t you live without?

Laughter. Bread. Books.

What’s on your nightstand?

Three Women by Sylvia Plath, A Passion for Leadership by Robert M. Gates and The Circle by Dave Eggers.

How have you balanced work and your personal life?

I raised my daughters as a single parent. I was committed to putting my family first— which included my daughters, my parents and my siblings. (I’m one of six children.) That required compartmentalization. I focused on work when I was at work, which allowed me to leave it there. I am very organized and detail-oriented, and I multitask constantly. At the same time I am constantly reprioritizing. I am calm, patient, efficient, analytical and decisive. Work is work—it is not my life. I was a school room parent; I went on field trips; I didn’t miss concerts or sporting events; I was home at night to fix dinner and do homework, and when I was with my daughters I was present.

What advice do you have for young women today?

Start with something that you enjoy and that complements your skill set. Be attentive, show initiative, find a mentor and be thoughtful in how you approach your work.

What are your favorite places in the county?

The trails in Fort Lee Historic Park, Bergen Performing Arts Center in Englewood and River Palm Terrace in Edgewater.

What would readers be surprised to learn about you?

That I was a singer and an actress. It’s ancient history, really. But I sang from a young age, and some said I was gifted with perfect pitch. A director from the New York Opera Company selected me for their touring production. I traveled to New York City for casting opportunities, but my analytical side realized that at each packed casting call, there were hundreds of people more committed (if not more talented). I continued through college and soon after headed for NYC—this time to Wall Street, not Broadway.

What accomplishment are you proudest of?

That I’ve lived my life as an individual, aspiring to use my unique abilities in all aspects of my life and to do so with humility, integrity and empathy. My parents believed in me, were proud of me and guided me by their example to always live without limitations. I never thought there was anything I could not aspire to or achieve. That is powerful. The living proof of my life’s success? That would be my daughters. They are individuals with intelligence, core values, humor and strength.